Apparently I'm pregnant. This news was recently brought to my attention, and while the whole world seems to have been aware of the fact, I have been going about my business as if I won't be giving birth to another human being just three short months from now.
Or at least one would assume so, based on the complete lack of preparation that has been made to ready our household for another person.
We often talk to Alex about having a new baby in the house, and we debate on a daily basis about what we will name this child, but all of the baby talk has just felt like "make believe" up to this point. You'd think the fact that I can't see my toes or bend over to touch them, the way every joint in my body protests when I dare stand up, not to mention the fact that the flames of hell blaze a fiery trail from my gut to my throat every time I lay down, would be a reality check. Oh, and the whole "tiny human boxing with my uterus" thing would probably cause some people to wake up and smell the poopy diapers. Not this gal!
People always ask when I'm due, and my canned response has been to sigh heavily, roll my eyes, and say, "June 12th" as if it is ten years away. In fact, on occasions when I have felt fatter and more uncomfortable than usual, "ten years" has been my actual response. That is until I went to MOPS a few weeks ago, and the ladies all said, "You realize that June is only three months away, right?"
So now I'm in complete panic mode, trying to dig through the garage/disaster area so I can get all of Alex's baby stuff cleaned, organized, and into the nursery, trying to wrap up the ten zillion custom orders I have going at my Etsy shop, and trying to prepare mentally for baby #2. Can you really prepare for something like that anyway? I think not.
Needless to say, I was pretty obsessed with being pregnant the first time around (re: the 100+ pre-Alex posts on this blog), and I was hoping I would be just as excited about the process this time. Not that I'm not excited about having a baby. I am ecstatic about adding another little man to this family. And despite the 18 weeks of wicked nausea, the heartburn, the weight gain, and the achy joints, I have enjoyed being pregnant. I just haven't had a lot of free time to reflect on what is going on or what is going to happen. Being pregnant has been even more surreal this time than it was with Alex. Surely having had a miscarriage has contributed to the fact that I've had a hard time accepting the reality of being pregnant, and as a result, I am just now coming to the realization that a baby is on its way.
On a related note, now that I am 28 weeks along, I totally regret not having taken pictures of myself throughout this pregnancy. In fact, I'm downright sick about it. On most days, Alex or I have some sort of commitment that requires me to get dressed in something "public-appropriate", and on other days, I barely have time to glance in the mirror to make sure that my sweatpants match my Crocs before leaving the house. (That's a joke, by the way. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing sweatpants.) I would never post a picture of myself in the latter state, and even on the days when I dress up, I am back in a frumpy t-shirt, stretchy pants, and fuzzy socks by the time Tim gets home. I know what you're thinking. That Tim's one lucky guy. But the point is, I'm in no condition to be photographed at that point.
So the alternatives are to have Alex take my picture during the day or to take them myself, and I just haven't been motivated to make either happen. I finally bit the bullet, knowing I was going to be writing this post, and snapped a couple of shots of my big third trimester belly. Be warned - I will be showing a lot of skin. Belly skin, that is.
I'm definitely bigger than I was at seven months with Alex, but then again, I was a whole lot bigger to start out with this time, too. The good news is, I'm in the third trimester and I've only had minor swelling in my feet and ankles so far. Of course, it hasn't gotten hot here yet, and surely I'm in for some serious canklage once the temperature rises. But so far, the swelling has been manageable, a vast difference from this description of my lower extremities from last pregnancy:
And not only has my belly swollen - my feet and ankles tend to balloon up so much by the end of the day that I am waiting for one of them to detach, not to be seen again until football season when it's flying over some stadium with "Goodyear" stenciled to the side.
So far, this is what I'm working with.
My socks leave an indention when I take them off and some of my shoes don't fit, but at least my ankle bone is still visible. We'll see how much longer that lasts.
So that's all I've got for now. I am working on several other posts, including a summary of this pregnancy and a discussion of other ways it compares to the first. I also hope to announce the baby's name soon...once we decide what it's gonna be, that is. Hopefully both posts will happen before this baby decides to come along.